By Ellen Donnelly – Business coach for entrepreneurs and founder of The Ask
There’s something quietly dangerous that happens to smart, driven people in business.
From the outside, everything looks great. You’ve built something profitable. People want what you offer. You’re recognised for your work. But underneath, something feels off. Not broken… just misaligned.
You’re not short on ambition. You’re not out of ideas. What’s missing is a sense of congruence.
This is the pattern I see with many of the founders and creatives I coach. They’ve moved beyond the scrappy early days. They’ve proven they can make money, attract clients, and build credibility. But now they’re asking a different kind of question.
Not “Can I do this?” but “Why am I still doing it this way?”
Not because they’re lost. But because the habits that helped them succeed—relentless standards, pushing through, outthinking everyone don’t feel sustainable anymore. And deep down, they know it.
That’s when purpose becomes essential, not as a slogan, but as a stabilising force.
Purpose isn’t a luxury. It’s a filter.
We often treat purpose like something we’ll figure out once we’ve ‘made it.’ But disconnecting from it has costs and they tend to show up early.
It looks like decision fatigue when everything sounds like a good idea but nothing feels like the right one. It’s chasing growth you’re no longer excited by. It’s quietly wondering if you still recognise yourself in the business you’ve built.
One client put it simply:
“I feel ungrateful for what I created, but I can’t lie to myself anymore.”
Purpose helps you stop spinning. It sharpens your yeses and speeds up your no’s. It makes your strategy more honest.
Not because it adds pressure but because it clears the noise.
You’re not just a set of skills
When I ask clients what they want next, they often start with skills or offers. But alignment doesn’t live there.
If you want a business that feels like you, you need to understand how you’re wired.
Not just in terms of personality tests but the real, lived patterns that shape how you move through work.
- Do you crave depth over speed?
- Are you at your best when teaching, not performing?
- Does structure calm your system or crush it?
These aren’t quirks. They’re strategic leverage.
When your business honours those traits, things click. Your message sharpens. Your offers land. Your energy holds up.
One founder I worked with was known as the go-to fixer. But what she really wanted was to ‘guide’ not ‘rescue’. That shift didn’t just change her model. It changed her experience of work.
High standards can be a strength… or a trap
A lot of high performers share this trait: they’re used to being excellent. It’s what got them here. But over time, that same wiring can turn against them.
They delay launches. Burn out from over-delivery. Avoid marketing because it feels too self-promotional.
They’re not afraid of effort. But they are quietly wondering: Can I let this be easier without losing my edge?
That’s a hard shift to make. It means redefining success not as doing more, but as trusting yourself more.
Structure isn’t the enemy of creativity
One of the stickiest myths in creative business is that structure limits freedom.
But if your best ideas live only in your head or your Notes app, they’re not helping anyone including you.
Many of the founders I work with are deeply creative and full of ideas but they’re stuck in loops. Overthinking. Starting and stopping. Spinning between pivots that never quite land. The answer isn’t another productivity tool. It’s scaffolding that reflects how you work best.
That might look like:
- One clear offer to focus on for the next six months
- Boundaries around your time for content or client delivery
- A coach or collaborator to mirror your thinking and keep you on track
Structure doesn’t dull creativity. It protects it. Like a trellis for a climbing plant and it gives shape to what’s already growing.
This is the work of a mature founder
At this stage, you’re not building for optics. You’re building for real.
That requires alignment. Between your ambition and your capacity. Between your offers and your wiring. Between your values and your ways of working.
It doesn’t mean burning everything down.
It just means pausing to ask: “Is this business built for who I really am and who I’m becoming?”
If the answer is no, that’s not a failure.
That’s your next brief.
Because the businesses that last aren’t built on pressure alone. They’re built on clarity. On purpose. On structure that supports, not stifles, your best work.
And when your business finally fits you… That’s when things start to work for you.
About the author:
Ellen Donnelly is a business coach and writer helping entrepreneurs build authority-led businesses. She’s the founder of The Ask and creator of Authority Club, where independent consultants and coaches become go-to experts in their field. Ellen also writes Monday Mornings, a newsletter exploring the entrepreneurial shift in the future of work.
Featured image: Ellen Donnelly, founder of The Ask and creator of Authority Club and Monday Mornings (Photo courtesy of Ellen Donnelly)
Disclaimer: The opinions expressed in contributed opinion pieces are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the views of Portugal Startup News.
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